Connection

I connected by video call with a friend in London a few days ago. Typical friend conversation, catching up on each other’s lives. Then something silly happened in the background and we both started laughing hysterically. One of those deep belly laughs that brings tears to the corners of your eyes. The kind of laugh that simply won’t stop. The “silly” thing was the unusual ring on her husband’s cell phone. Nothing earth moving and probably something that is only outrageously funny when you’re in a light mood, in the company of a good friend. In the course of that call, a few more topics came up that sent us into fits of laughter. It had become contagious.

That laughter lingered the rest of the day for me. My step was lighter and I actually enjoyed every activity I engaged in through the day. Nothing felt like ‘work’. And it got me wondering…

When was the last time I’d laughed like that?

It caused me to reflect on work and life in general because something has changed. Laughter used to be my rocket fuel. Initially I’d blamed COVID and all the remote work, but then I realized it had started well before then. Laughter came less frequently for more than a handful of years leading up to the shutdown. When and why did life get so serious?

My basic conclusion was simple lack of connection. Human connection doesn’t require years and years of knowing each other. It can occur in minutes – purely by relating to each other. Relating means you not only see each other, but understand each other. Agreement isn't required for relating. Understanding requires no judgment. It's completely neutral.

The internet has brought a lot of good things, but it also brought some things that are disrupting our ability to truly connect as human beings. With the advent of 24/7 technology, we are inundated by a constant stream of fear-based media and advertising. Social media and public forums promote unhealthy attacks on a personal level. Fear and anxiety abound – personally, socially, nationally. We can’t see through the veil of that gloom to recognize there are genuine human beings on the other side. Stuck in insecurity, we can’t see our own unique value and lack the confidence to show up as our authentic selves. The fear and anxiety linger, creating isolation while we tiptoe around each other. Isolation has no room for laughter. And it’s certainly difficult to make a connection when you engage from a place of judgment.

In 2017, Heineken conducted a social experiment called “Worlds Apart”. It was launched on YouTube and advertised heavily in the U.K. It’s powerful. It will be worth your 5 minutes. No actors – all real people. https://youtu.be/pe7p4mEY2uk

I want the laughter and connection back. And I want to recognize the humanity in everyone I meet- even if we have differences. No knight in shining armor will be showing up to resolve this current state of society. There is only one way to correct the trajectory, and that’s one person at a time. I'll start.

#IChooseHumanity